Stolen from Darryl's DeviantArt

Q: Type in "[your name] needs" in the Google search.

Matthew needs to bring sexy back

(Yeah, sexy has been gone a little while too long)

Q: Type in "[your name] looks like" in Google search.

Matthew looks like a molestor

(... That has to change)

Q: Type in "[your name] says" in Google search.

Matthew says, I ain't Scarreeed!!!!!

(Damn Right)

Q: Type in "[your name] wants" in Google search.

Matthew wants to know why a girl is answering his friend's phone

(Depends which friend.. some are more promiscuous than others)

Q:Type in "[your name] does" in Google search.

Matthew does Mozart's Rondo Alla Turca

(On guitar, of course...)

Q: Type in "[your name] hates" in Google search.

Matthew hates Elmo

(The whiney wee pillock!)

Q: Type in "[your name] asks" in Google search.

Matthew asks, Where's the beef?

(... Oh God, this is getting ugly)

Q: Type in "[your name] likes " in Google search.

Matthew likes to bend Fiona over and bhukaki her.

(If Fiona doesn't enjoy it, then I'm in trouble...)

Q: Type in "[your name] eats " in Google search.

Matthew eats six whole nutmegs

(Omnomnom)

Q: Type in "[your name] wears " in Google search.

Matthew wears the swallow cufflinks

(interesting choice)

Q: Type in "[your name] was arrested for" in Google Search.

Matthew was arrested for having sex with a student

(Damn, didn't realise that was a crime!)

Q: Type in "[your name] loves" in Google Search.

Matthew loves the internet

(It has its charms)